I am not the Father!!

I think watching the Maury show made these feelings come out that I try so hard to supress.  It is not my fault that I feel this way it really is not.

Parents stop forcing your f*cking children on me.  I don't give a f*ck that your child is the sunshine in your damn life.  That is fine and dandy and everything but that is not my child.  Let your child be the center of your universe not mine.  I mean that was your 15 seconds of fun anyways!!!  If you ask me you probably should have been more creative and swallowed but that is neither here nor there.  The one child that is my pride and joy is my God child so everybody else can screw off.

Don't get it twisted, I do like children but I need to ease my way there.  The natural progression of me and the child building a relationship will happen without you trying to get a free babysitting moment.  The fact of the matter is that you think I am supposed to spend time with the lil booger because it is yours.  What makes you think I give a f*ck about you that much?  I understand that children are expensive, time consuming and can be down right annoying but you should not have poked holes in the condom because you thought the dude was a good catch or because the chick was so bad and you wanted her to be with you forever.

F*ck you, your child and for good measure your couch too!!!!