Black Friday

So for the fourth or fifth year in a row I have gotten up early in the morning to partake in this Black Friday nonsense.  I only do this because of my best friend who swears this is some big tradition of ours.  All of this is bullsh*t getting up stupid early in the morning and going out and lining up in front of some stores to do some shopping for some "deals" that might not really be deals.

So this morning my friend comes to pick me up at 7am after being only two hours late having me wait early in the damn morning.  We end up going to the mall and saw all type of damn hooligans out there looking like a hot damn mess.  Listen folks just because it is early in the morning does not mean that everybody else is blind and can't see that you look like sh*t.  Ladies please take them ugly a** scarves with all them damn colors off your head.  If you hair is jacked up and you look like a nappy headed hoe then put a damn hat on please or stay your a** in the house.

Gentleman and I use that term loosely and I mean veery loosely please take off them doo rags.  You are outside the house and it is no longer the nineties.  You are not a rapper err- you are not a "real" rapper maybe something of an aspiring rapper but let it go.  Also, pull your freaking pants up sir!!  It is 2010 and your jeans look like them jerking kids from California.  Soooo, your jeans are colorful and tight but yet I still manage to see your boxers.  How does that even work?  I tell you what next time I see anybody with their pants below their waist with a belt on I will get one of my big football playing buddies to plow you.  You will then be broken.  Word to Star!!!  Matter of fact all you dudes out there with cornrows let that sh*t go too.  The prison look is dead man unless you are Jim Jones or Pusha T.

Another beef of mine are when people are just in the way.  Why stand in the way of the escalators when you see me with bags and you are not getting on?  Please don't lift your shirt up in public and rub on your stomach.  Why in the hell do you think people want to see your nasty stomach.  Please don't forget basic hygiene either.  It is very early in the morning but please please brush your teeth.  That morning breath is still rocking and  very very offensive.  Be mindful of others and keep some gum on you.